Well, I’m glad to say that this is much more a subject for discussion now than it used to be in the past particularly with men wouldn’t have dreamt of saying that they were having problems to any other man because it would be considered a failure and that it was a slight on the man himself – that’s not the case anymore. So many men, in one out of six couples experience infertility, so lots and lots of men are having these problems and I think there’s a comedian in the UK called Rod Gilbert who has been very very funny and amusing but also got the point across that this is not something to be embarrassed about. It’s just like having a cough or having diabetes. It’s just something that happens, It’s an illness and it’s certainly no slight on your manhood or your virility. So the more open the topic becomes, the more people can be counselled by their friends, by their family, they can talk about it openly and yes of course there’s a very much an important place for professional counsellors as well but I think the couples should decide for themselves as to when that should happen but there’s no doubt that this is a very very emotional journey for any couple and the more support and counselling that they can have either informally or formally, the better they’ll be able to prepare themselves and cope with their fertility journey.
The most simple and hardest answer is to just talk, have a simple conversation, talk to each other. Men find it hard to let people in but women, please pursue us as we will give in but we do also need our space. Personally I found that with me and my partner, what made us stronger was exercise, we go on a lot of walks such as walking up mountains in Wales where we tend to talk but we did not really speak at the start of our fertility journey.
Listening to podcasts can help, hearing other peoples stories and you can seek a lot of comfort from this. Educate yourselves a little better and your relationship will improve and you will communicate better.
